Fun on Friday: Little Gold Nuggets for Your Ears

Are you an audiophile? Do you want your music to sound like gold? I’ve got just what you need. Gold earbuds.

No. No. No.

I don’t just mean gold colored earbuds. I mean earbuds covered in actual gold.

Flare Audio’s in-ears are coated in 24-karat gold. They can be yours for a mere $1,306.47.

Yes, that price seems oddly specific. But that’s the cost posted on the company’s website.

Flare calls these their “flagship” earphones. They’d better be “flagship” if I’m going to pay over $1,300 for them. In fact, they’d better be coated in gold at that price.

Oh, wait…

Now, when it comes to headphones, the big question for me is always, “How do they sound.” I gotta be honest. I don’t care if they’re gold. It’s not like some dude is going to walk up to me as I’m sauntering down the street jamming to some tunes, peer knowingly into my ear and think, “Wow, that guy has gold headphones. I’m really, really impressed. I wish I could hang out with him!” In fact, the guy will probably think, “How much did he overpay for those cheap fake gold earbuds.” That means in order to get the full enjoyment of impressing people with the fact that I paid $1,367.47 for earbuds, I would have to tell everybody I run into, “Check it out, real gold,” as I point awkwardly at my ears.” That just seems weird. So, no thanks.

But according to Flare, the gold will actually improve my listening experience. Or at least that seems to be the implication.

Flares® GOLD are precision turned and then coated in 24ct gold, giving the Acoustic Lens a flawless and highly polished finish. This creates a perfect reflector inside the earphone, focussing pure sound directly into the ear with supreme precision.”

I don’t know. I’m not buying it. And by that I mean I’m literally not buying it. If I’m going to overpay for headphones, I’ll just pick up some Beats by Dre.

I’ll say this though. There is one other benefit that might just push you over the edge if you’re teetering on that buy decision. With your purchase, you get free membership in the “Golden Ears Club.” I don’t know if you’ll get a cool membership card, but you will “have exclusive access to special offers as well as being the first to know about any new product releases and updates.” In other words, you will have the opportunity to plunk down another chunk of change on the next Flare product to hit the market. Maybe they’ll come out with some platinum earbuds.

In all seriousness though, this once again proves a point I make often in this Fun on Friday column. Gold makes things more valuable. Flare isn’t going to fetch $1,300 for headphones made of brass, even though they would look pretty much the same. People want to own gold.  They know it has value.

If you’d like to buy some gold, but you’re not particularly interested in earbuds, call a SchiffGold precious metals specialist today. They can tell you about other benefits of owning gold such as how it has historically helped investors preserve their wealth. Just call 1-888-GOLD-160. It will be music to your ears. (Sorry, I couldn’t resist.)

Fun on Friday is a weekly SchiffGold feature. We dig up some of the off-the-wall and off-beat stories relating to precious metals and share them with you – with tongue firmly planted in cheek. Click here to read other posts in this series.

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